She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
