Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
third nipple confirmed
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
