Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
