how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
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i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
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Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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