she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
