Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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