ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Randomize
