I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
