The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
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