whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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