Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize