Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize