PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
