ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
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