i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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