why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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