What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Randomize
