I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Randomize
