Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
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