well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
