Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
I wish i was in the wii world.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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