There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
