Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize