Kiss
Puke
Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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