I didn't shave. On purpose
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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