My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
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