Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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