I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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