It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize