just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Randomize
