Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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