Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
