Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Randomize
