Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
