When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
