I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
