I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize