This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Randomize