i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
