I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
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