You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Randomize
