Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize
