ya dads aren't the best wingmen
look no pants
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
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