I'd wear matching sweaters with you
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
