Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(574): View more from Indiana

I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?

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(574): I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight? http://tfl.nu/h1kj

Replies (10) Good night (1783) Bad night (450)
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(678): View more from Georgia

After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory

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(678): After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory http://tfl.nu/nm21

Replies (23) Good night (668) Bad night (5113)
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(713): View more from Texas

I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.

(512): View more from Texas

babe, don't say it like that!

(713): View more from Texas

I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.

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(713): I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight. (512): babe, don't say it like that! (713): I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening. http://tfl.nu/iuma

Replies (139) Good night (38984) Bad night (1622)
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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.

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(814): I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade. http://tfl.nu/dxnr

Replies (14) Good night (1200) Bad night (3228)
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(917): View more from New York City

If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you

(917): View more from New York City

Those had pot in them

(917): View more from New York City

And good luck on your interview asshole

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(917): If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you (917): Those had pot in them (917): And good luck on your interview asshole http://tfl.nu/911g

Replies (51) Good night (17295) Bad night (1526)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.

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(508): I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch. http://tfl.nu/jvw8

Replies (22) Good night (1019) Bad night (7947)
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(847): View more from Illinois

This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.

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(847): This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword. http://tfl.nu/au8n

Replies (12) Good night (4010) Bad night (999)
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(703): View more from Virginia

I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.

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(703): I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver. http://tfl.nu/n7jh

Replies (23) Good night (5564) Bad night (1848)
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(757): View more from Virginia

some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.

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(757): some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs. http://tfl.nu/d9oe

Replies (9) Good night (3386) Bad night (834)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.

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(203): I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed. http://tfl.nu/np6x

Replies (5) Good night (1728) Bad night (827)
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(773): View more from Illinois

He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.

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(773): He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof. http://tfl.nu/nzip

Replies (5) Good night (1224) Bad night (395)
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(318): View more from Louisiana

I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.

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(318): I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case. http://tfl.nu/3tdp

Replies (10) Good night (1726) Bad night (433)
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(229): View more from Georgia

I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.

(1-229): View more from Georgia

I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.

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(229): I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier. (1-229): I feel like I got ass raped in the brain. http://tfl.nu/l1ue

Replies (15) Good night (815) Bad night (513)
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(315): View more from New York

Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.

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(315): Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised. http://tfl.nu/8j6k

Replies (3) Good night (705) Bad night (292)
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(928): View more from Arizona

He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.

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(928): He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart. http://tfl.nu/tciz

Replies (4) Good night (1093) Bad night (186)

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