the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize