filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize