Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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