STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
