Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just high enough for therapy.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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