We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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