Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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